The Thesis Story Part 1

I think I am beginning to get a grip on this thesis writing business. It helps that I am writing my thesis in the age of technology, where research is a few clicks away and analysis is in the comfort of your study while blasting your choice of music.

These past few days have been a blur of processing NMR spectras. And it involves this ridiculously crazy process of putting dots on the spectra so that everything line up proper. Think of it as connect-the-dots, except in reverse as the line is already there and what you need to do is to put in those silly dotties.

So. It is a simple and brainless task. The perfect job for a trained monkey. Easy peasy. It is something that even Homer Simpson cannot screw up even if he TRIED. One would think that I would be having a grand time doing such a simple task.

Well, guess what? The weirdest thing happened. I realized that I could only do this silly dotting if a song of extreme ANGST is playing. Think Eric Claptons’ ‘Before You Accuse Me’. Think Savage Gardens’ ‘Break Me Shake Me’. Honestly! I never thought that mundane tasks would push me to that sort of an edge.

In case you need to know, the latter song has been played 180 times, according to the iTunes counter. That’s a lot of hours doing work. And being angsty. And of shout-singing ‘BREAK ME, SHAKE ME, HATE ME, TAKE ME OVER’. But at least work-work is still being attempted. And being accomplished. –inserts a proud grin-

Reading back, it seems that I should not have started this entry the way I did. ‘Got a grip’ doesn’t seem apt after sharing the above-mentioned story. But trust me people, I was in a worse off place. I begin to write this entry with a specific story in mind to illustrate that.

Some weeks back, a full day of writing and data appreciating would give me the shivers and shits. I would crave sunlight and company and conversation. I would literally shake with withdrawal. And my mind would go into overdrive. The TV will not placate and there is no comfort in food. And all I was doing mentally is working (20%) and screaming CAPITALS in my head (80%)!

I am glad to say that I am no longer that way. My grip on thesis writing is here, in the center of my palms. Two weeks ago, when I was typing at my computer, all that I am thinking is ‘Why do we have to write a thesis to be graded, why can’t we just be graded like that?’. Now, I am a picture of zen with a pen tucked behind my ear, my trusty notepad right in front of me; to jote down all-important numbers, and feeling ‘This is me, writing, working, this is how it all should be.’

Ooooohhhh yesssss. This is all how it should be.